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Thursday, August 19, 2021

The Good, The Bad And The...Strange (Doctor Selection)

I believe that selecting a doctor is kind of like a hit or miss thing.  You pick one based upon the best information you have, then you are kind of stuck with him or her right?  I mean after all, there is no way that you are going to fill out that much paperwork again for another doctor anytime soon right?  So let’s kind of go through selecting one and ensuring that they are right for you. 

For me, I’d like to have a doctor that is a chain smoking, overweight, near-sighted and shy diabetic.  That way he/she wouldn’t be able to destroy me if my A1C was over 5.6%.  I’ve had a few general practitioners that I kept because they didn’t berate me for my exceptional intake of calories due to insufficient willpower and restraint.  Now those appeared to be good working relationships, probably to the detriment of my health.  Selecting a specialist or surgeon is something completely different. 

I don’t know how doctors select their own specialties, but the one that fascinates me most is a proctologist, and even if the money is really really good…Also, if there is an ear, nose and throat doctor, why isn’t there a shoulder, elbow and wrist doctor, just sayin’.  If that logic is maintained, shouldn’t there be an anus, penu…never mind.  Anyway, how do we know they’re any good, we don’t.  Only through time and experience with that doctor can we actually determine their ability and competence.  I do suggest though, that if you don’t feel comfortable after the first meeting, you should consider finding another before you are too deep in the process. 

Surgeons are more difficult to predict.  It’s not like you can go up to a surgeon and ask what their batting average is?  “Uh, excuse me doctor, what is your average survival rate?”  Look, even the best hall of famers only get on base three or four in ten times.  I’m looking for my surgeon to say, “One of them left my office once and was immediately hit by a bus, but other than that, I’m perfect!  Good luck getting those stats.  You can also attempt to glean information by presence and attitude but the best surgeon I’ve ever had, and I’ve had a few, had the personality of a mortician, but the skills of Michael Jordon. 

So how do we select our doctors?  I suggest to you, research, research and more research.  We typically spend more time looking for used cars than we do selecting the people that will ultimately have our lives in their hands.  Use every reference you can find.  Sites like Zocdoc provide ratings on doctors based upon patient reviews, their insurance plans and locations.  Do an internet search for their name, licenses and lawsuits.  Many of the better doctors you may have a hard time getting an appointment with due to availability or they may no longer be accepting new patients. 

Ultimately though, you are the head of your own medical team, if you are unhappy with one of your providers, replace them.  Also, ASK QUESTIONS.  Part of your responsibility it to ensure that you are completely aware of all of your choices.  In order to make the correct choices, you must be aware of all of the associated data.  Informed decisions are the best decisions.  Make yours count.

Handi-Crapped is based upon a true story.  Insensitive Bastard is a man who questions his medical treatment, but does he question it enough, you decide.  Be well!


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